
Dating Daycare
Welcome to "Dating Daycare," the ultimate safe space for women navigating the unpredictable world of modern dating. Join hosts Melissa Firpo and Allison Waterman as they dish out candid advice, share hilarious anecdotes, and tackle the toughest dating dilemmas faced by women today.
In a dating landscape filled with frogs disguised as princes and a jungle of jerks, Melissa and Allison offer a nurturing haven where women can laugh, learn, and empower each other to find love on their own terms. From ghosting to breadcrumbing, from disastrous first dates to navigating online profiles, "Dating Daycare" covers it all with wit, wisdom, and plenty of wine.
With Melissa's no-nonsense approach and Allison's comedic charm, each episode feels like a heart-to-heart chat with your best girlfriends over brunch. Whether you're swiping left or swiping right, "Dating Daycare" is your go-to guide for surviving and thriving in the wild world of modern romance.
So grab your favorite beverage, kick back, and join Melissa and Allison as they navigate the highs, lows, and hilarities of dating life. Because when it comes to matters of the heart, everyone could use a little TLC from "Dating Daycare.
Dating Daycare
Season Two Kickoff: Leopards Don't Change Their Spots! True Stories from the Dating Jungle
Ever met someone whose dating behavior makes you wonder if they ever emotionally matured past middle school? Welcome back to Dating Daycare for our Season Two premiere, where we're refreshed, revitalized, and ready to dive back into the wild world of dating disasters!
The return of our popular "Dick of the Week" segment brings two compelling stories that perfectly illustrate why some people never grow up. First, there's Jake, who thought it appropriate to explain his two-month disappearing act by bragging about "all the girls obliging his cock." Then we meet a 73-year-old man divorcing his wife of nearly five decades, who immediately tried hitting on someone 25 years his junior. Both stories highlight our central message: leopards don't change their spots, and you can't fix someone who doesn't see themselves as broken.
This episode explores the uncomfortable truth about large age gaps in dating relationships and what they often reveal about emotional maturity. When someone consistently pursues partners much younger than themselves, it typically signals they're unwilling or unable to connect with age-appropriate partners who would expect matching levels of emotional development and life experience. As we discuss, a healthy 73-year-old should be enjoying retirement and grandchildren – not prowling for dates young enough to be their children.
We're excited about what's coming this season, including TikTok live sessions, guest appearances, and more of your favorite segments. We want to hear your own "Dick of the Week" nominations – email us through our show notes or join our Facebook group. The best stories might even earn you a guest spot on the show! Are you ready to navigate the jungle of jerks with us? Season Two promises to be our best yet!
Join our private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/771136888074777
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Welcome to Dating. Daycare where we help you navigate through the jungle of jerks. And we are back season two. Can you believe it? We've made it through a year. We have, we're refreshed, we've vacationed somewhat.
Speaker 2:Yeah, had a little rest.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we need a little R&R and we are back. We have some new things we're gonna bring on.
Speaker 2:We have some old.
Speaker 1:Tiki-taki audience live. I have to look, that's my name on TikTok. Please friend me, join me, whatever you call it. You know I'm not good with that and whenever we go live you will know and we're also going to do Dick of the Week our favorite. We're bringing back some old favorites, so it's going to be great. We're excited we have new guests coming on. We love our guests. Something very exciting.
Speaker 2:Yes, very exciting.
Speaker 1:So something very exciting, yes, very exciting. So we are happy to be back. We are excited to be back and, uh, we're excited to do our show today.
Speaker 2:All right, with dick of the week. We both have a dick of the week we do.
Speaker 1:It's been a while, so they've built up, you know, in the background. For those of you that don't know and that are just joining us, dick of the Week is where me and Allison.
Speaker 2:Nominate just a really piece of crap kind of guy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, or just something along those lines, like who was the Dick of the Week, you know? So you go first, allison.
Speaker 2:All right. So this is not someone I was personally had the pleasure of being acquainted with, but a young lady from one of the Facebook groups did so. It's a guy named Jake, from the city, I don't know, like 30s, so looks like a professional type guy. So he kind of reached out to her. It looks after a period of two months and he's like hey, just remembered you, how's it been two months. And he's like hey, just remembered you how's it been. Didn't mean to not message you, by the way, it was just work and all the girls obliging my cock. It's like a sea of pussy here. Doesn't sound like you need me. Then she says, oh no, just the opposite. You came across my mind for a reason.
Speaker 1:Okay, melissa seems to think that that guy didn't become a dick today. Okay, that guy has been giving her some snarky comments the whole time, the whole time, and she entertained it. That was her first mistake.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah, I think she blocked him after this, but I think my my thing with this was that while he was doing himself no favors by saying something like this, he probably in his mind thought he was kind of you know that negging kind of thing where a guy Like you think you're being funny, but you're not.
Speaker 2:Yeah, where you'll kind of get a girl like you'll break a girl down a little bit with her self-esteem and try to make her feel bad in an attempt to get her to like you or feel that you're a big guy or you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but here's the thing, yeah, big guy or you know, yeah, but here's the thing, yeah, he, that was established through the previous relationship that they already had. I wish we saw one. Okay, if a guy, just so you all know, out there, if you ever see me in the wild, if a guy ever said anything like that to me or even hinting towards that, not so snarky and so disrespectful, but let's pull it back. Like I'd like to sleep with you or you're some hot tail, like some snarky comment you would never hear from. Not only would I not even respond to the text message, you would be blocked, so that comment could never even come across the board. The minute the disrespect started and I feel like and I could be completely wrong he slept with her in order to have a comment like that.
Speaker 2:She said no, no, yeah, she said no. But can I tell you, though, I've had perfectly normal civil conversations with men, and then they pull something like that out of their back pocket With me, not giving them A reason to think that I would be okay with that, right, yeah, they need to be blocked.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they need to be blocked. That is ballsy, as I would say.
Speaker 2:Yeah, ballsy, I would love to meet this Jake you were never meeting that.
Speaker 1:Jake.
Speaker 2:Okay, any of these guys we asked to come on here.
Speaker 1:What was that?
Speaker 2:Jake can you find?
Speaker 1:us and just you know, yeah, jake's never finding us, could you explain yourself? Okay? No wait, I'm gonna go from.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's never explaining himself because he knows he doesn't have the balls right actually right and no one was, um, uh, obliging his cock, it was his right hand. Yeah, please, amala and his five, her five fingers was obliging god I can'ting his little weenie. Okay, and then I have my dick of the week, so listen it's a good story.
Speaker 1:Okay, this is a really good story, this is funny.
Speaker 1:So this isn't exactly like dick of the week. This is just to show you, ladies, because we get a lot of women being like, oh, maybe he'll mature, maybe he'll change, maybe I could change him right like the bob the builders. So here is just a great funny story, all right. So my neighbor is getting um their house resided. We were a whole bunch of constructions going on right next door, so this was like thursday during the week I go to walk my dog.
Speaker 1:I walk my dog in the front yard, not the backyard, because there's so many rabbits in my backyard. Anyway, she's a teacup chihuahua, really cute. So I'm walking her, walking her, and there's all these cars parked on the street. So I start walking. The dog's leading me where she's sniffing, and this older gentleman starts walking, I'm assuming, towards his car. So we kind of almost you know, collide because his door's here and the dog is sniffing there. So he comes up to me now very good looking older gentleman. Right off the bat I knew that when this guy was younger he had all the the ladies right. I mean older, okay. So when you say older, well, he told me his age eventually. But if I had to guess originally, Wait till you hear this, ladies.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so older, okay, but so anyway he starts talking to me. He tells me he's been doing the siding. He's into siding and windows. He retired in 85, then got into garbage 85,.
Speaker 2:there's your clue.
Speaker 1:Right, well, but I knew that.
Speaker 1:For those of you that are good at math yeah, I knew by looking at him that he was much older than me Starts telling me that he's getting divorced. I go divorced. He's like, yeah, as long as she is, you know, nice and mellow. I told you she could have whatever she wants. So I turned to this gentleman. I said listen to me, because he said her name. I'm going to make up a name right now because I don't name names, so this is a made up name. He said Jennifer, which is not the name. As long as she is civil and nice, jennifer could have whatever she wants. I said how many kids do you have with Jennifer? He said I have four kids and eight or nine grandkids. I said wait, wait, I said to him, and you're getting divorced. He said he's 73. Okay, I said 73.
Speaker 2:Go get him.
Speaker 1:Melissa, I said you're getting divorced, I go. You killed Jennifer. I go for 45, 50 years, I go. You killed this woman For her to be divorcing you.
Speaker 2:The cooking, the baking, the cleaning the children pushed out of her body and he started talking.
Speaker 1:He goes. Well, I wasn't that I go. Stop right there I go. I could tell aesthetically who you were. I said this guy was cheating on poor Jennifer, left and right. When I tell you this was a very good-looking older man, even at 73, I will give credit where credit's due. He was very handsome, put together, manicure done, very good looking Italian, you know old school. So he turns to me and he goes maybe we should go for a drink, maybe you should. Now, the reason why I'm bringing this story up for Dick of the Week, ladies, is because A I always say this to you A leopard never changes its spots and you are not going to change a spot. Just looking at this guy, I have to assume and I'm sure I'm not wrong that, oh my God, sounds like you're letting your fantasy become your reality. Hugh G, I'm telling you it's not a fantasy. This really happened to me and I'm just I'm not into like 73-year-olds, but wait for my explanation here.
Speaker 1:I know Jennifer had to be gorgeous in her day because this guy was good looking. He was not marrying anybody that he did not think was aesthetically beautiful. I know it right, because he's 73 and still going and for younger women the leopard has not this guy has been doing this as old or older than his children.
Speaker 1:I'm probably the same age as his children or older than his children. He's still going at it. He's 73. His spots have not changed. Poor Jennifer didn't change him. The four children he had didn't change him. The nine grandchildren he has didn't change him. This is who this man is till the day he dies. So all you women out there, what do you think an assumption is? Look?
Speaker 2:what does that mean? His name is Hugh G. Rection.
Speaker 1:I mean, come on, oh my God, what a name Anyway. And then, and look at Hugh, those hands say you're older than his children. Listen, hugh, oh, please, that doesn't even offend me, hugh, I'm 48. I have no problem with age. Next, you could tell me that I've hit the wall and all I'm going to get is a 73-year-old, and it still won't bother me. Oh my Lord, yeah, you met the wrong girl.
Speaker 1:Okay, so now here's the other thing For a 73-year-old man I also say this all the time to you, ladies For a 73-year-old man I also say this all the time to you, ladies for a 73-year-old man to be hitting on me, 48, or, let's bring it down, a 33-year-old man hitting on a 19, 20, 20, anytime, there is that huge age gap. Now I know some of you are going to say well, I'm married to a perfectly great man. I'm not talking about the 2% of the population, okay, we're talking about the whole here. Those men or women because women do it too are emotionally inept in their age range or they don't want to Put in the work.
Speaker 2:Forget about the work.
Speaker 1:Or they don't want to put in the work. Forget about the work. Be where their moral values should be. At that age, For instance 73,. You should be retired. You should be enjoying your grandchildren right, If you wanted children.
Speaker 1:Now is the best part Taking advantage of your senior citizens Traveling, taking advantage of your senior citizen Traveling and you should be talking to Jennifer about your life and how you have these beautiful nine Going to Italy, paris, not hitting on some 48-year-old that you want to go to Blackstone with and have a drink. What do I have in common with you? I'm like in the prime of my life. Right, I have young kids. I'm trying to make as much money as I can. Right, I have in common with you I'm like in the prime of my life, right, I have young kids. I'm trying to make as much money as I can. Right, I have dreams like I'd love a Ferrari. I mean, I have all these things going on in my head. This 73-year-old he's retired, it's done for him. What is what?
Speaker 2:is he doesn't have much I mean before you're a nurse to him.
Speaker 1:To be honest, but I mean, my point is is that that tells me that that man is emotionally unwell, he's stunted because he isn't where he should be? That's like me. I would never go and date a 20 year old. I don't care if they liked me, didn't like me if I could, if I couldn't. Just we're not on the same wavelength, we're not at the same places in life. They could just start drinking. I've been drinking for years and really choose not to drink that much anymore, like I don't want to go to a club. We should be at different places in our lives. So, ladies, any older gentleman, you know that's hitting on. That's when you see the older, like the anna nicole smith, with the young girl he better have a shit ton of money.
Speaker 1:I mean, that's the only I mean reason for you to be. Good morning Roberto.
Speaker 2:We met a while ago. I remember him from last time. Yes, Robert.
Speaker 1:How are you Right? Live to ride. You have nothing in common with an 18-year-old and if you think you do, there's something wrong with your emotional maturity really is what it comes down to. I mean, this 72-year-old's grandkids are probably my kid's age, and not only that, but at that age I mean the way this aesthetically is. I'm 48, he's 73. Do you think I'm bringing you around? My kids I mean my kids would turn around and be like he's older than grandpa, like who is this guy and forget about that. So what's the objective here? You want to get laid.
Speaker 1:Like I don't understand the objective right. Like. What else do we have in common? That's when you know, ladies, they're just emotionally inept, not there, not mature. But I know we get questions about these things all the time. You're not changing him. He's the same way, he's always been, and he's emotionally immature and poor. Jennifer. She had enough after 40-something years.
Speaker 2:Take the house, she's like bye-bye. You know. Go on vacation and find yourself a little boy toy.
Speaker 1:Jennifer's there with her kids and grandkids and doesn't have to deal with him anymore. But you know, unreal it's just. It is what it is, yep, so that's my like tick of the week.
Speaker 2:And it looks like we might have some candidates for the next tick of the week. Oh we, always do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, what's the age you would date Moose Windsor? I'm 48. So you know what I know you're not a fan of the podcast. You know how I could tell Moose Because I always say this I'm always the pot that calls the kettle black.
Speaker 1:I have. Uh, they're turning nine, no, 10 and 11. Now I would never date a man with young kids like me, ever I. I it's not my thing. I'm not not a Brady Bunching my life. I'm not becoming a stepmom and being on your kid's soccer field. It's just not what I want to do. So I would have to obviously date somebody older, so you know, in their upper 50s, whose kids are already in college. So you know, usually in your 40s you have somewhat younger kids. So I would look for a little bit older so that I'm not Brady Bunching my family. The Real McCoy but you're still watching. He's saying not nice things, he's not nice. The Real McCoy. She looks 58. That's okay. Everybody gets older, right, mccoy. She looks 58. That's okay. Everybody gets older, right, mccoy. The alternative is death. So as long as I get older, I'm good to go, good to go, and my looks aren't for everybody, right.
Speaker 2:And what's wrong with 58?
Speaker 1:And what's wrong with 58?
Speaker 2:Isn't Jennifer Aniston 58?
Speaker 1:Yeah, like what's wrong with 58? Everybody't Jennifer Aniston 58? Yeah, Like what's wrong with 58? Everybody gets older. I'm not trying. I never said I'm 20. I couldn't date a woman under 45. She is 48 because I've known her since for a long time. Oh, thank you, Moose. Thank you, robert, the real McCoy. There's just people on TikTok, right, yeah. What's just people on TikTok, right, yeah. What's wrong with 58? There's nothing wrong with it. You think I look 58? That's okay, all right, so. So that is our Dick of the Week, yeah, yes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, ladies, like you know where to find us right. Yeah, tell us your Dick of the Week. We want to start hearing from you, especially this season. We want to be able to discuss it.
Speaker 1:We want to hear your dick is all the week. How do they get in touch with us, allison um so?
Speaker 2:look on the show notes of our podcast.
Speaker 1:It's dating daycare we're on all platforms dating day.
Speaker 2:That's a good place.
Speaker 1:Email us, yeah, and we could have you on. We could even have you on the show to tell us your dick of the week. Yeah, that would be fun.
Speaker 2:Because I know there are hundreds of thousands of you on that infamous Facebook group online.
Speaker 1:So just yeah, our Facebook group.
Speaker 2:Dating Daycare.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we're all over the place. You can find us all right. Good, all right. Well, it's been fun. We will see you soon and, uh, welcome back you.